If you let a person drive your car who is not insured through either your insurance, or hers as a driver (with an active policy which covers her for the use of your vehicle) - You are 100% responsible and on the hook if she kills someone. there is no insurance company in the world that would cover you otherwise.
And, keep in mind, if she was impaired, there has been legal precedence where they have refused to cover the liability if the insured person was impaired as it a condition of insurability - so you are still on the hook.
NO WAY
Put the foot down. Trying to "accommodate" someone to be "nice" versus this HUGE risk is asinine. Your wife should be ashamed at herself for even putting you in a situation where you feel guilty for saying NO to such an obvious no brainer.
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