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06-28-2013, 02:50 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Calgary
Posts: 9,599
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10 Rules for Dating my son
It's a MOM thing
Attention Mamas of Boys! We always see the "Rules for Dating My Daughter"...well, here are the "Rules for Dating My SON"!
Rule One: If you talk with foul words and dress like a floozy in shirts that are too small and pants low with thong showing, then I will treat you like one. You are only allowed to wear granny panties super glued to your hind quarters.
Rule Two: If you date my son, you only date him. He has a kind heart and I will not have you make my son cry; if he does, I will make you cry. You may only date one of my sons. Ever.
Rule Three: You must know how to cook as well as I have taught my son to cook. He is a big eater. Frozen dinners do not count.
Rule Four: Do not be hurt when my son chooses sports over time with you. Join in and learn the game. Shopping does not count as a sport.
Rule Five: Do not date my son for his money, because I am his bank. Do not expect expensive gifts, because he has been taught to be a savvy shopper.
Rule Six: Do not sleep with my son. The only rubber he should be concerned about is out in the driveway and has Goodyear stamped on it.
Rule Seven: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pudgy, baggy-eyed, last-season, has-been. But on issues relating to my son, I am the queen of his universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth. If you do not, I will ask him. Do not trifle with me.
Rule Eight: My son has been raised not to hit a lady. So act like one and I will not have to hit you for him. 
Rule Nine: If you need more than 30 minutes to dress for a date with my son, be prepared to talk with him only during halftime and commercial breaks for identification from the local station.
Rule Ten: My son is not a toy. He does not have Hasbro, Mattel or any other toy company tattooed on his person. Hence, he is not an object for you to play with, manipulate, and discard at your leisure. I suffered through 42 hours of labor to have him, and will unleash an unimaginable amount of anger such that the movie 300 will look like an episode of the Little House on the Prairie should you cross me.
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06-28-2013, 02:51 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Southern Alberta
Posts: 184
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What are the rules for dating your daughter?
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06-28-2013, 02:56 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Calgary
Posts: 3,316
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What are your sons rules for someone dating you???
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06-28-2013, 03:12 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: flms
Posts: 3,911
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My son will know what types you date and what types you dont
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the days we are at our best we can play with anybody, problem is those days are getting farther and farther apart
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06-28-2013, 03:15 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: High River, AB
Posts: 10,788
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I'm certainly not inclined to date your son MOM. 
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06-28-2013, 03:17 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Calgary
Posts: 9,599
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gitrdun
I'm certainly not inclined to date your son MOM. |
You boys have said what you would do to boys who date your daughters and so I wanted to share the mom side of it for sons.
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06-28-2013, 05:48 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Calgary
Posts: 274
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gitrdun
I'm certainly not inclined to date your son MOM.
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X2
I don't think there are many guys are here interesed in dating your son.
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1 shot.....1 kill.
Last edited by swift1; 06-28-2013 at 06:12 PM.
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06-28-2013, 03:14 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Calgary
Posts: 9,599
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrSmooth
What are the rules for dating your daughter?
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We already went through that list, I am sure you will even find an application on here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MtnGiant
What are your sons rules for someone dating you???
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As far as he is concerned mom doesn't date.
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06-28-2013, 05:11 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 1,969
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrSmooth
What are the rules for dating your daughter?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FishingMOM
We already went through that list, I am sure you will even find an application on here.
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http://www.outdoorsmenforum.ca/showthread.php?t=113550
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In my world stock options and group therapy means something completely different!
'Never trust anyone who says you can't legally own something because they don't like it'. - Me
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06-28-2013, 06:40 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Southern Alberta
Posts: 184
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rod1960
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Oh my
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06-29-2013, 01:06 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 1,969
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrSmooth
Oh my
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??
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In my world stock options and group therapy means something completely different!
'Never trust anyone who says you can't legally own something because they don't like it'. - Me
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06-28-2013, 09:57 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Quesnel BC Canada
Posts: 5,615
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FishingMOM
It's a MOM thing
Attention Mamas of Boys! We always see the "Rules for Dating My Daughter"...well, here are the "Rules for Dating My SON"!
Rule One: If you talk with foul words and dress like a floozy in shirts that are too small and pants low with thong showing, then I will treat you like one. You are only allowed to wear granny panties super glued to your hind quarters.
Rule Two: If you date my son, you only date him. He has a kind heart and I will not have you make my son cry; if he does, I will make you cry. You may only date one of my sons. Ever.
Rule Three: You must know how to cook as well as I have taught my son to cook. He is a big eater. Frozen dinners do not count.
Rule Four: Do not be hurt when my son chooses sports over time with you. Join in and learn the game. Shopping does not count as a sport.
Rule Five: Do not date my son for his money, because I am his bank. Do not expect expensive gifts, because he has been taught to be a savvy shopper.
Rule Six: Do not sleep with my son. The only rubber he should be concerned about is out in the driveway and has Goodyear stamped on it.
Rule Seven: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pudgy, baggy-eyed, last-season, has-been. But on issues relating to my son, I am the queen of his universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth. If you do not, I will ask him. Do not trifle with me.
Rule Eight: My son has been raised not to hit a lady. So act like one and I will not have to hit you for him.
Rule Nine: If you need more than 30 minutes to dress for a date with my son, be prepared to talk with him only during halftime and commercial breaks for identification from the local station.
Rule Ten: My son is not a toy. He does not have Hasbro, Mattel or any other toy company tattooed on his person. Hence, he is not an object for you to play with, manipulate, and discard at your leisure. I suffered through 42 hours of labor to have him, and will unleash an unimaginable amount of anger such that the movie 300 will look like an episode of the Little House on the Prairie should you cross me. |
More....there should be more??? 
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06-28-2013, 10:11 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Ft Mac
Posts: 551
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Fishin Mom you knocked that one out of the park.Articulate concise and just a hint of femal griz
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06-28-2013, 10:13 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: 3rd rock from the sun, formerly from 4th rock from the sun
Posts: 5,000
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Right on
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 I may not be the brightest crayon in the box at times but I sure am colourful 
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06-28-2013, 11:33 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,075
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GOOD GRIEF
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06-28-2013, 11:48 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Okotoks
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Excellent set of rules FishingMom. You obviously do not want your son just being some sort of "Trophy Husband" for some girl. (or anybody else)
You made sure it didn't happen to you and it certainly isn't going to happen to him with this set of rules. Nice work.
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06-29-2013, 09:57 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,391
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FishingMOM
It's a MOM thing
Attention Mamas of Boys! We always see the "Rules for Dating My Daughter"...well, here are the "Rules for Dating My SON"!
Rule One: If you talk with foul words and dress like a floozy in shirts that are too small and pants low with thong showing, then I will treat you like one. You are only allowed to wear granny panties super glued to your hind quarters.
Rule Two: If you date my son, you only date him. He has a kind heart and I will not have you make my son cry; if he does, I will make you cry. You may only date one of my sons. Ever.
Rule Three: You must know how to cook as well as I have taught my son to cook. He is a big eater. Frozen dinners do not count.
Rule Four: Do not be hurt when my son chooses sports over time with you. Join in and learn the game. Shopping does not count as a sport.
Rule Five: Do not date my son for his money, because I am his bank. Do not expect expensive gifts, because he has been taught to be a savvy shopper.
Rule Six: Do not sleep with my son. The only rubber he should be concerned about is out in the driveway and has Goodyear stamped on it.
Rule Seven: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pudgy, baggy-eyed, last-season, has-been. But on issues relating to my son, I am the queen of his universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth. If you do not, I will ask him. Do not trifle with me.
Rule Eight: My son has been raised not to hit a lady. So act like one and I will not have to hit you for him.
Rule Nine: If you need more than 30 minutes to dress for a date with my son, be prepared to talk with him only during halftime and commercial breaks for identification from the local station.
Rule Ten: My son is not a toy. He does not have Hasbro, Mattel or any other toy company tattooed on his person. Hence, he is not an object for you to play with, manipulate, and discard at your leisure. I suffered through 42 hours of labor to have him, and will unleash an unimaginable amount of anger such that the movie 300 will look like an episode of the Little House on the Prairie should you cross me. |
The boy you have is not special maybe to you he is but to the rest of us he is not. I teach my kids to make there own choices and guide them to make the right ones for them selfs. I swear some parents want to sleep with there kids!
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06-29-2013, 10:01 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Calgary
Posts: 9,599
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gopher
the boy you have is not special maybe to you he is but to the rest of us he is not. I teach my kids to make there own choices and guide them to make the right ones for them selfs. I swear some parents want to sleep with there kids!
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guess what its a freaking joke - just like the application and rules for dating daughter jokes!.
Lighten up ...... Go shoot some gophers!
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06-29-2013, 10:13 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,391
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FishingMOM
guess what its a freaking joke - just like the application and rules for dating daughter jokes!.
Lighten up ...... Go shoot some gophers!
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What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner? Punch line " The angle of the dirt bag "
dentists and insurance sales men dressing up like the dude from
The village people is funny to me. My underlying thoughts are not kind to Harley riders so I tell jokes about them.
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06-30-2013, 10:03 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: At the end of the Thirsty Beaver Trail, Pinsky lake, Alberta.
Posts: 24,781
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FishingMOM
guess what its a freaking joke - just like the application and rules for dating daughter jokes!.
Lighten up ...... Go shoot some gophers!
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Thank you FishingMOM for the good read, made me laugh, some have forgotten how to laugh, now I am going to go sight my bow in!
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