Destination Weddings?? popularity +++

[Photoplex]

Originally Posted by CaberTosser

<lots of good sense>.

Totally agree

[eastcoast]

Originally Posted by CaberTosser

Also known as an "other peoples money" wedding. Can't afford it yourself locally; so why not guilt all your friends and family into subsidizing you & your whims? Its easy to set budgets when you don't have to come up with the cash yourself like in the real world. I'm relating a specific instance where a lifelong friend got married shortly after a business failure that cost anyone financially involved a lot of money (myself included). Then the jerk had the gall to invite me to a wedding where I couldn't afford to attend because of the money he just lost me; his in-laws sponsored their end of things. This being the time he actually got married; versus the 3 other times he'd been engaged and asked me to be best man for the ones that never happened. I cut the cord on that particular loser.

That being said it may not be quite the level of ignorance for other people; but you should really consider the budgets of the guests, and that some people who may not be able to afford to attend, may feel saddened by their inability to join. Others may have used up their holiday time already, or have infants that make the trip difficult or kids that can't stay at the resort.

It can work, but think of more than just yourselves.

when me and my wife did it we already had a house,2 dogs a new vehicle basically the only thing missing was a ring and a piece of paper,we never asked anyone to help pay for anything I paid for it all myself ahead of time including my mom's part.

we did consider other people and if they could go or not,but it was our wedding not their's,they get the chance to do what they wanted with their's. I do not need anybody telling me what to do for mine,a wedding is a personal thing I would never tell anyone what kind of car they should drive because I may get a ride once and a while,I would not tell anybody what kind of house to build cause I may visit once and a while nor would I tell anybody how or where they should get married cause I may show up.

[TreeGuy]

Destination weddings = "Please don't come, but send gift here ______"

[Justanotherbuck2]

Blood tests, 27 years ago when I got married in Calgary they were mandatory here too...you mean they are not anymore? I think Eastc.. posts make my point perfectly clear about the ME generation everything he says supports that. For those of you that seems to have missed my comment on a meaningful wedding that means your guest list too! So those third cousins on my aunts side once removed etc, etc... would not be an issue. Tell your kidlets you will have a small hall reception for them when they return to celebrate with the true Friends and family that could not afford to attend the foreign wedding, really a hall costs squat and a few buns and chili BBQ can be done by you and the misses. More of a sociable than a wedding do people still use that term. A quick liquor license and a cash bar to donate any profits to the bride and groom after the expenses have been paid. Whatever they decide its as has been stated here..Their Choice.. ask them to pay for your tickets betcha that don't fly!

[Jamie]

12 years ago, Heidi and myself decided that having a wedding here in Calgary was to much to handel.
So on a Tuesday, Air Canada came off of strike and announced some great fares to Vegas. By Saturday we had 17 people in Las Vegas from all parts of Canada and the USA. For those that couldn’t afford to come, we helped with Air and hotel. It was the best wedding for us. And still after all these years, we have no regrets. We did it up first class in Vegas and the ceremony was very nice.

Once we got home, we did a blessing ceremony in Edmonton (My Father in law is a minister) and had a open house in Calgary.

I say let them do what they want as long as they understand they will get some minor grief from some people, but at the end of the day.. IT DOESNT MATTER. Do it for yourself.

Jamie

[eastcoast]

Originally Posted by Justanotherbuck2

Blood tests, 27 years ago when I got married in Calgary they were mandatory here too...you mean they are not anymore? I think Eastc.. posts make my point perfectly clear about the ME generation everything he says supports that. For those of you that seems to have missed my comment on a meaningful wedding that means your guest list too! So those third cousins on my aunts side once removed etc, etc... would not be an issue. Tell your kidlets you will have a small hall reception for them when they return to celebrate with the true Friends and family that could not afford to attend the foreign wedding, really a hall costs squat and a few buns and chili BBQ can be done by you and the misses. More of a sociable than a wedding do people still use that term. A quick liquor license and a cash bar to donate any profits to the bride and groom after the expenses have been paid. Whatever they decide its as has been stated here..Their Choice.. ask them to pay for your tickets betcha that don't fly!

yes it's about me and my wife of course as it should be it's our wedding,what's next people are gonna disagree with what we call our kids cause it's not convenient for them or they don't like it,my first rule in life is look after myself cause no one else is going to,if people come then they come,if they don't then they don't that's all I think of itit's my day and I will do what I want with it.

[Okotokian]

My brother got married later in life, after I already had kids. He was thinking about an overseas wedding. I told him it was a great idea if that's what he wanted, but that I and my family wouldn't be attending. $$$$$ plus my wife is a teacher and can't take off whenever she pleases. "Send us some pictures". He changed his mind.

Personally, I think the idea is a little self-indulgent. Have a wedding here so your relatives and well-wishers can all come and join in witnessing your marriage. Then attendance isn't dependednt on bank account and ability to take a week off. You don't have to spend a ton on a fancy reception. Heck, have an afternoon reception with some snacks and a few drinks. Then you and your bride hop on the plane and have that romantic get-away honeymoon.

That said, it's all personal choice. If you don't care about who can come and who can't then go for it... but it begs the question of why you would invite anyone if you don't really care if they can come.

[Photoplex]

Originally Posted by Okotokian

That said, it's all personal choice. If you don't care about who can come and who can't then go for it... but it begs the question of why you would invite anyone if you don't really care if they can come.

Can't help but agree with this. For me, my wedding will be about sharing that day with my friends and family - for them to be witness to the union.

If I had to choose between a Hollywood wedding at some palatial exotic location and not having some of my closest friends and family present, or having a low key event at home with those people present - it's a no-brainer.

[Mike_W]

Originally Posted by wwbirds

maybe but if that is the case it has backfired on him already for a few he would prefer not to attend obviously won't or can't spend the money but a few he invited (including me) and actually wanted there have said $2500. US plus expenses for a week is too much. there won't be an open bar in either location. Maybe I am old fashioned but if you like Hawaii go there for a honeymoon or even have a reception or service there but the main event should be localized where most of the family and friends can conveniently attend if they wish and are invited without spending major coin.

Hey man I understand where you are coming from, but it's your son's wedding, you have got to go! No matter how good of a father you have or havnt been, it will always remembered that you didn't make there wedding.
As a father $2,500 is a pretty easy bill to foot considering customs are that the sons father picks up the booze at a wedding. This gets you out of that and a wedding gift.....not to mention you do get a nice vacation out of it.!!!

Cheers,
Mike

[FishingMOM]

WWbirds

PM the dates and times and I will work my magic and see if I cant find you a good deal.

I seem to be the company travel agent anyways.


JEN