A Couple of jokes

[Lorne]

A woman went into a bar in Texas and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest feet she’d ever seen. The woman asked the cowboy if it’s true what they say about men with big feet. The cowboy grinned and said, “Sure is, little lady! Why don’t you come on out to the bunk house and let me prove it to you!” The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him a $100 bill. Blushing, he said, “Well, thank ya Ma’am. I’m real flattered. Aitn’t nobody ever paid me fer mah services before. The woman replied, “Don’t be flattered. Take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.”


Norwegian Love Story


> > >
> > > Ole & Lena lived by a lake in Northern Minnesota. It was springtime,
> > > and the lakes were just beginning to thaw.
> > >
> > > Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral
> > > store to get him some smokes. She asked him for some money, but he
> > > told her, “Nah, yust put it on our tab.”
> > >
> > > So she walked across, got the smokes at the general store, then walked
> > > back home across the lake. When she got home and gave Ole his smokes,
> > > she asked him, “Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up da tab at da
> > > store. Why didn’t you yust give me some money?”
> > >
> > > Ole replied, “Vell, I didn’t vant to send you out dere vit some money
> > > ven I vasn’t sure how tick the ice vas.”