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11-16-2021, 09:48 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Edmonton area
Posts: 1,467
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Divorce lawyer help.
Well, after 20 years, and untold ups and downs, my wife has decided to leave. 2 kids, 14 & 12 that are going through a brutal time. Starting to get nasty, was hoping I wouldn't need a lawyer, but here I am. Can't afford the best, but sure could use a good lawyer right now.
In Edmonton, anybody know a good divorce lawyer please.
Thank you
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Wherever you go, there you are
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11-16-2021, 09:50 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Oct 2021
Location: Living On A Lake
Posts: 534
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If you are having a hard time financially, get a Legal Aid Lawyer, there are free!
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11-16-2021, 10:08 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: McBride/Prince George
Posts: 14,567
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Quote:
Originally Posted by North40Rules
If you are having a hard time financially, get a Legal Aid Lawyer, there are free!
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Thought those were for criminal charges…. Was unaware they did domestic stuff too…..
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11-16-2021, 10:13 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Lloydminster Alberta
Posts: 1,298
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Talking moose
Thought those were for criminal charges…. Was unaware they did domestic stuff too…..
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yup they do domestic stuff too.
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11-16-2021, 10:14 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: McBride/Prince George
Posts: 14,567
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dodgeboy1979
yup they do domestic stuff too.
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Good to know. I make a lot of women mad.
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11-16-2021, 10:19 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Oct 2021
Location: Living On A Lake
Posts: 534
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Talking moose
Thought those were for criminal charges…. Was unaware they did domestic stuff too…..
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Yep, I married a lady from a very wealthy family, when she wanted to get divorced ( Thank God), her family hired the best and most expensive law firm in the province.
I quit work, got a legal aid lawyer and never paid a cent, and got exactly what I wanted, she was deeply depressed over that hehe.
Seen too many of my friends go to the poor house over a divorce. I was determined not to be a victim
Last edited by North40Rules; 11-16-2021 at 10:36 AM.
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11-16-2021, 10:34 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Alberta
Posts: 24,071
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call John Magee- Magee Richard Tugood 780-437-2240 ext 222
Tell him Ken sent you, Please.
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Only dead fish go with the flow. The rest use their brains in life.
Originally Posted by Twisted Canuck
I wasn't thinking far enough ahead for an outcome, I was ranting. By definition, a rant doesn't imply much forethought.....
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11-16-2021, 11:42 AM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: A bit North o' Center...
Posts: 11,150
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I don't have any recommendations - just sorry to hear that, man.
Best of luck as you and the kids deal with this going forward.
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11-16-2021, 01:05 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 3,281
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stinky Buffalo
I don't have any recommendations - just sorry to hear that, man.
Best of luck as you and the kids deal with this going forward.
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X2. Sucks for sure.
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11-16-2021, 01:17 PM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Red Deer
Posts: 1,531
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The process is pretty much standard so see a couple lawyers (1st visit is usually free) See if you connect.
When I started mine, I got a tiger lawyer but she came to meeting unprepared and tried to bully the process. Dropped her and picked a relaxed one.
Be willing to give in to end the case.
If everyone is open, it should go pretty quick.
Even if your wife didn’t work, she still deserves half for what you as a couple did.
If it is split evenly and fairly, neither of you will be happy.
If your happy, she is being ripped off and vide versa.
Be civil. Keep your mouth quiet. It’s all about your kids now. Enjoy your new life.
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11-16-2021, 04:17 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 6,496
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John McCrae law in Edmonton. John is excellent.
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You matter. Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared... ...then you energy.
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11-16-2021, 05:01 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 209
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Talking moose
Good to know. I make a lot of women mad.
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Quit turning them down.
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11-16-2021, 05:03 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: McBride/Prince George
Posts: 14,567
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FXSB
Quit turning them down.
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Trust me. They like to be turned down. Beats staring up at me.
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11-16-2021, 07:39 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2021
Location: Strathmore
Posts: 1,391
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Ahhhh , yes ,divorce ...
"from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals thru his wallet."
Best of luck. Let your lawyer do ALL the talking.
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11-16-2021, 07:57 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In your personal space.
Posts: 4,787
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Talking moose
Trust me. They like to be turned down. Beats staring up at me.
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This may be one of the funniest things I have read on this forum. Well done Mr. Moose.
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When in doubt, use full throttle. It may not improve the situation, but it will end the suspense.
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11-16-2021, 10:27 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 251
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Map Maker
The process is pretty much standard so see a couple lawyers (1st visit is usually free) See if you connect.
When I started mine, I got a tiger lawyer but she came to meeting unprepared and tried to bully the process. Dropped her and picked a relaxed one.
Be willing to give in to end the case.
If everyone is open, it should go pretty quick.
Even if your wife didn’t work, she still deserves half for what you as a couple did.
If it is split evenly and fairly, neither of you will be happy.
If your happy, she is being ripped off and vide versa.
Be civil. Keep your mouth quiet. It’s all about your kids now. Enjoy your new life.
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This plus please don’t forget about the kids!
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11-17-2021, 07:51 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Near Edmonton
Posts: 15,043
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Sorry for your troubles, hope it goes relatively smoothly so you and the kids can move forward. All the best.
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11-17-2021, 09:41 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Nov 2020
Posts: 82
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I'll tell it straight to you. Best case scenario, you're most likely going to lose 50% of everything; even with a good divorce lawyer. The worst case, the kangaroo court will take you in for everything.
Best advice I can give you is to document everything. Like how many times you spend time with kids, text massages, etc. etc. So when the day of reckoning comes, you at least have some proof on your end.
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11-17-2021, 09:52 AM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Calgary
Posts: 5,297
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as a guy that has went through it, it sucks
get the best lawyer you can afford. Things go south for so many reasons, keep records and write thing down.
as for the kids mine were a little younger and yes its hard on them but both of mine and many others made it though and are great kids
the best advice I can give you is SELF CARE and never discuss anything around them.
Good luck.
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Avatar by Gitrdun
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11-17-2021, 10:05 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 4,032
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Justfishin73
"..Well, after 20 years, and untold ups and downs, my wife has decided to leave. 2 kids, 14 & 12 .."
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The above is where I paused at..who will be taking care of the 12/14yr old?Whoever it is, the other person
'should be more than willing' to give more than 50% of the share out of goodwill, a bigger loss. Remember
this well:
Your kids will grow up and remember your actions then!
At the age of 6, I certainly recall a long ago coward running off and leaving with all kinds of petty minded
things out of spite. This also brought out loads of bad feelings, be fair and far thinking fishing73, do it for
them/offspring. Be somewhat sacrificial, it's worth the investment.
Last edited by tri777; 11-17-2021 at 10:11 AM.
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11-17-2021, 10:24 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Edmonton area
Posts: 1,467
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Thanks guys. This sure is no fun.
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Wherever you go, there you are
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11-17-2021, 01:23 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,420
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RandyBoBandy
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Mediation is worth a look ..
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11-17-2021, 04:53 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 5,612
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Try to talk to her one more time. The lawyers will take money from you and your wife and they will get rich… not you. If you can avoid lawyer by giving up a bit more- it’s worth it!
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11-17-2021, 05:29 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 520
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stob
Mediation is worth a look ..
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Absolutly this ^^^^^
Looks bad on her if she denies attempts by you to mediate.
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11-17-2021, 05:42 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 6,496
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Justfishin73
Thanks guys. This sure is no fun.
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I did up a simple spreadsheet. Assets on the left. Debt on the right. Included everything decently sizeable. She owns half of each. The end. Then it's the kids. Not very fair but the spouse with whom the children reside with is usually receiving the support. Until children are at least 18
I was never going to argue over crap like furniture, tv's, etc so in the end I made her an offer she couldn't refuse. She got the house. I got the rrsps. When the issues of support etc came up I said NO. House can be sold with no taxes paid. Rrsps were going to be taxed. IF I made it long enough to collect them. $100k difference between the two assets with me on the short side, + my assets being taxable. She took it and ran.
Make some concessions but don't be cowed. Easy to figure out asset splits. 50/50 on all. Kids make it harder but if you offer assets translating to dollars most folks see NOW money as having more value than Future money. They'll argue using the kids as pawns but it's usually about their own pockets. Take a harder kick in the junk at the start and offset some pain the future.
My lawyer pretty much nailed it when he told me right at the start, " if only one person walks out of the final boardroom meeting smiling we lawyers didn't do our job properly." " If both parties walk out p****d off we nailed it."
It's painful for sure but your life will go on, you'll laugh again, and in a few years it won't really matter much at all.
Fyi the spreadsheet had it pretty much nailed. Not that she gave it more than a passing glance at the time, but I made sure to show it to her again once the dust settled. Just so she could see how much she could have saved on lawyers fees. She went inexpensive strip mall lawyer. I went with big firm experience and interviewed 3. That error cost her and saved me. At one time mine even went after HER for support when things were dragging. A token amount but that got the negotiations rolling real quick. Once you're at that stage things move quickly.
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You matter. Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared... ...then you energy.
Last edited by 270person; 11-17-2021 at 06:11 PM.
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11-17-2021, 05:52 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Right where I wanna be
Posts: 708
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I was in the same situation about 7 years ago.
I made up my mind then that having two sons the odds of one of them going through the same thing one day was pretty high.
I figured I’d show them how to do it as a gentleman.
It ain’t easy. But it gets better.
Best of luck.
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Hope is for those who failed to plan.
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11-17-2021, 05:56 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 6,496
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stob
Mediation is worth a look ..
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I'd never even contemplate mediation vs lawyer. Know too many that have paid miles over normal lawyer fees fiddle farming around mediating every little thing for too long. May work for some but that's not been my experience in talking with others.
Best advice I can offer is get it over with fast by making concessions at the onset. And get a good lawyer. The cheapest will cost you more in the long run. All the divorce law practises know one another pretty much. They all know what the fair deal is, what the laws allow, and they don't really take sides. They're adjudicators more than anything else. They've heard it all before. Get them talking. Make concessions on 50/50 which is highly unlikely to happen. Get it over with. Get on with life. Start dating a Scandinavian women half your exes age. WINNING!
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You matter. Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared... ...then you energy.
Last edited by 270person; 11-17-2021 at 06:14 PM.
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11-17-2021, 09:16 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 286
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Having been through my own and courtside (no pun intended) for several others My .02 is it all depends on the person you are and the person you are divorcing. If you can be civil and reasonable (good luck) then mediation is by far the cheapest and quickest for both of you. Divide assets fairly and work out post divorce supports for the kids and/or each other. Kids first and foremost which is why it would be nice to avoid the long ugly fight over peanuts which are actually emotions and hate. I don't care what everyone says. the kids always get dragged into it. A good friend of mine and his ex were those people and got divorced for $3500 all in. Including the legal advice from a lawyer which everyone has to have. My divorce, not so much. 8 years from start to finish. As said above, if its by the court's law, assets are 50/50 and so are marital debts. Depending on where the kids are living, child support is by defined schedules based on income. Not any fun at all. One caution I missed!! Any money you pay your ex as "support" when you are separated does not count when you finally get signed off. It is considered a GIFT. You are responsible for income tax on any of that money as well. I've been been up close to 5 divorces in our circle and the only one I though was a success was the mediated one. But it takes special people to be able to do it. Good Luck
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11-17-2021, 10:09 PM
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Gone Hunting
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Between Bodo and a hard place
Posts: 20,168
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Quote:
Originally Posted by North40Rules
If you are having a hard time financially, get a Legal Aid Lawyer, there are free!
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And worth every penny you pay.
__________________
I'm not lying!!! You are just experiencing it differently.
It isn't a question of who will allow me, but who will stop me.. Ayn Rand
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