 |
11-25-2022, 10:30 AM
|
 |
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: The Bush
Posts: 2,797
|
|
Good Lawyer for child support/alimony
I did the mediation to try and avoid being nailed to the wall.
Im walking away with what everyones saying is super high spousal support and child support. (4300/month)
Anyone have a no BS lawyer they can recommend in the Edmonton area that can review our mediation agreement to see if I can get it lowered?
|
11-25-2022, 02:52 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 314
|
|
Damn. $4,300.00 per month seems like a lot. I suppose it depends on your income, number of kids etc. but if you have the income of a mere mortal you'll be at the food bank or living in a shelter with that kind of garnish.
I suddenly want to be nicer to my wife....
|
11-25-2022, 04:44 PM
|
|
Banned
|
|
Join Date: May 2021
Posts: 358
|
|
Spousal Support should not be a thing. Getting laid and paying for it is already illegal, don't know how this is legit. I feel for you, good reason why ALL young men should learn to get a Prenup.
|
11-25-2022, 04:59 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Parkland County
Posts: 2,380
|
|
So you guys agreed to try to avoid lawyers, and hired a mutually agreed upon mediator to make a judgement based upon the information you guys dually provided—and the outcome wasn’t what you wanted and now want to lawyer up?
I assume around half is child support. You might do well by just paying it, keeping things on good terms, and later try to renegotiate. Especially if you find yourself financially struggling… which considering you’d need to be making around $160k/year gross just to keep 50% of your after tax take home pay.
__________________
And unlike the clock on the wall at your momma house, I do not have time to hang.
|
11-25-2022, 05:07 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 530
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by troutbug
I did the mediation to try and avoid being nailed to the wall.
Im walking away with what everyones saying is super high spousal support and child support. (4300/month)
Anyone have a no BS lawyer they can recommend in the Edmonton area that can review our mediation agreement to see if I can get it lowered?
|
That’s not high. I know a guy paying twice that amount and his ex is still trying to get more cause it isn’t enough.
|
11-25-2022, 05:12 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Parkland County
Posts: 2,380
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by IL Bar
That’s not high. I know a guy paying twice that amount and his ex is still trying to get more cause it isn’t enough.
|
Yep. For all we know, OP’s wife may have talked to some people she knew and was told that was way too low and she should consult a lawyer.
You’re already ahead of the game saving on all the lawyer fees, OP. Do you want to risk paying MORE while also paying off a $20,000 lawyer bill?
__________________
And unlike the clock on the wall at your momma house, I do not have time to hang.
|
11-25-2022, 05:44 PM
|
|
Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Strathmore
Posts: 5,623
|
|
How old are the kids? Might be easier to just pay the price & save the fight. There is a formula that is reviewed annually, might get adjusted up or down with income.
__________________
If you're not a Liberal when you're young, you have no heart. If you're not a Conservative when you're old, you have no brain. Winston Churchill
You can, you should, & if you're brave enough to start, you will. Stephen King
|
11-25-2022, 06:37 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,958
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by roper1
How old are the kids? Might be easier to just pay the price & save the fight. There is a formula that is reviewed annually, might get adjusted up or down with income.
|
Lawyers are junk. I stopped using them. If you want a good paralegal me know.
Frankly best advise is do Mediation period. Refuse to nothing else.
|
11-25-2022, 08:00 PM
|
 |
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,588
|
|
Numbers sound pretty similar to alot of my coworkers. Good luck really...
|
11-25-2022, 08:22 PM
|
|
Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Strathmore
Posts: 5,623
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokey
Lawyers are junk. I stopped using them. If you want a good paralegal me know.
Frankly best advise is do Mediation period. Refuse to nothing else.
|
To clarify, I'm suggesting he might be money & relationship ahead to pay the mediated sum if the kids are close to adults. Best of luck to everyone involved.
__________________
If you're not a Liberal when you're young, you have no heart. If you're not a Conservative when you're old, you have no brain. Winston Churchill
You can, you should, & if you're brave enough to start, you will. Stephen King
|
11-25-2022, 08:44 PM
|
|
Banned
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 5,701
|
|
I know a gold digger that was trying to milk a ton from
Her ex in spousal support
He was smart, he totally dropped his income level, didn’t work any ot, took a job in the office instead of the field. They ended up splitting custody. She ended up not getting very little in the end
A lesson for all the guys who wives quit their jobs and stay at home while you’re busting your balls in the field.
She owns you
|
11-25-2022, 10:46 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2010
Location: The Forgotten Corner
Posts: 781
|
|
I feel for you my dude, I have experience in the field haha.
It is legalized theft/extorsion and not one person can or will convince me otherwise.
My advice to you is to hire the absolute best lawyer you can. Search all lawyer reviews in your city, pick the best one that you can afford and is available(availability is the key).
God bless brother.
|
11-25-2022, 11:11 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2021
Posts: 146
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by cacty
I feel for you my dude, I have experience in the field haha.
It is legalized theft/extorsion and not one person can or will convince me otherwise.
My advice to you is to hire the absolute best lawyer you can. Search all lawyer reviews in your city, pick the best one that you can afford and is available(availability is the key).
God bless brother.
|
I guess only you can determine the best path but child support is reduced when you share the kids 50/50 - maybe that’s a good option, plus it keeps you actively involved with them instead of the ex keeping you in the dark. If she’s that kind person. The thing is - if you hire a lawyer and spend all this money, your end result likely won’t be much different but you’ll have a big lawyer bill and then in the long run - it’s the kids that suffer because you can barely afford regular bills let alone any extras for fun with the kids. It sure can be a battle, especially if the ex is difficult. I feel for you. Best of luck. I hope things turn out ok.
|
11-26-2022, 12:08 AM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2021
Posts: 146
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by troutbug
I did the mediation to try and avoid being nailed to the wall.
Im walking away with what everyones saying is super high spousal support and child support. (4300/month)
Anyone have a no BS lawyer they can recommend in the Edmonton area that can review our mediation agreement to see if I can get it lowered?
|
The other thing I forgot to say is that lawyers will often feed off of a persons anger against the other parent to get them to continue to fight it out which only lines their pockets even further with court appearances and trials. They don’t help you refocus on what’s actually best for the children because if both parents truly prioritize the children, then a resolution would be met faster which equals less money for them. They will fight every battle you want whether they think there is a shot in hell they can win it. Because win or not, they get a nice fat pay check. And don’t get me wrong, I know not all lawyers are just out for the pay check but I also know that no lawyers say hey- I’m not going to charge $400 an hour- I’m going to help the good average person for half that. So… I’d say it’s a very money driven industry.
|
11-27-2022, 09:45 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: The Bush
Posts: 2,797
|
|
Things are going the opposite way I thought they would. She has gotten greasy, totally corrupted my youngest against me, my oldest knows the games being played and still loves me.
Generally through the court system how long does it roughly take for a child support/alimony case from start to judgment?
|
11-28-2022, 01:03 PM
|
 |
|
|
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Alberta
Posts: 2,445
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by IL Bar
That’s not high. I know a guy paying twice that amount and his ex is still trying to get more cause it isn’t enough.
|
No, that's high. That's like saying a $1m/year salary isn't high because you have a buddy who makes $10m/year.
|
11-28-2022, 01:22 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Parkland County
Posts: 2,380
|
|
OP, just a light suggestion to be careful about what you are writing here. It is an open forum and you’ve been a user here for nine years with over 2500 posts so I am sure your wife is aware of this place.
Imagine seeing your wife post on some mom Facebook group about how she’s not happy with the support payment $ the mediator proposed and she’s looking for a lawyer to “review” it. What would you immediately start to think?
Try to keep a real cool head. I am hoping for the best for you and your kids.
__________________
And unlike the clock on the wall at your momma house, I do not have time to hang.
|
11-28-2022, 01:27 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Red Deer
Posts: 1,531
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by troutbug
Things are going the opposite way I thought they would. She has gotten greasy, totally corrupted my youngest against me, my oldest knows the games being played and still loves me.
Generally through the court system how long does it roughly take for a child support/alimony case from start to judgment?
|
It’s over. Its just numbers now. Watch how you talk around the kids. They will love their mom no matter what so keep your opinion to yourself.
It’s pretty cut and dry on payments so both parents have close to the same so one doesn’t influence the kids with providing better.
Every year, you will update based on incomes so things will change.
Fight all you want but your gonna fall into the trap just paying lawyer fees.
|
11-28-2022, 01:30 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 391
|
|
Your gross income and number of kids (plus ages) are really needed for a post like this OP.
Child support tables exist and always gonna be a big difference between a guy making 50k a year with 2 kids and a guy making 500k with 5.
|
11-28-2022, 01:33 PM
|
 |
|
|
Join Date: May 2007
Location: West Central Alberta
Posts: 6,670
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by jstubbs
OP, just a light suggestion to be careful about what you are writing here. It is an open forum and you’ve been a user here for nine years with over 2500 posts so I am sure your wife is aware of this place.
Imagine seeing your wife post on some mom Facebook group about how she’s not happy with the support payment $ the mediator proposed and she’s looking for a lawyer to “review” it. What would you immediately start to think?
Try to keep a real cool head. I am hoping for the best for you and your kids.
|
This here. Not even the ex, a friend of the ex even and the repercussions could be substantial.
If I was the OP I would be asking that this thread be deleted.
|
11-28-2022, 05:21 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 3,885
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by FortMac
Spousal Support should not be a thing. Getting laid and paying for it is already illegal, don't know how this is legit. I feel for you, good reason why ALL young men should learn to get a Prenup.
|
Why should spousal support not be a thing?
You think it's fair for the mother who spends her time at home with the kids (alot of the time giving up their career) to raise a family, while the husband earns the dough? You're saying the mother doesn't deserve anything? I'm giving a worse case scenario, but typically even if they are both working, one has to give up or compromise their career for the family.
I know someone who gave up high paying career 15 years ago to raise kids (yes it was both their choice/wish), he cheated on her. You think she doesn't deserve anything?
|
11-28-2022, 05:56 PM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 530
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by pinelakeperch
No, that's high. That's like saying a $1m/year salary isn't high because you have a buddy who makes $10m/year.
|
What is an average spousal support level that we can compare to then if the OP level is considered super high?
|
11-29-2022, 10:03 AM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 6,266
|
|
Guys you also need to provide support for kids when they are at college/trade school etc. Lets face it you cannot afford to get divorced anymore old adage 'She got the Gold Mine he got the Shaft'.
|
11-29-2022, 11:10 AM
|
|
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2021
Posts: 146
|
|
Calling a relationship quits and the whole process that accompanies it is rough no matter what. And that is true even before the evil dollar even comes into play. I’ve always been a believer that If there is even a glimmer of hope to save the marriage, it’s worth all the work - for the kids sake and for the husband and wife who’ve invested so much already but lost their way. I know it’s not always possible. I’m living proof of that and I wish I wasn’t for a million reasons. I technically am eligible for child support from my ex who earns a bit more than me. I refused it. Spousal didn’t come into play for us because she has always worked outside of the home. Costs add up whether that be child /spousal support or lawyers and then people get so caught up in money they forget the kids are what’s important.
|
11-29-2022, 12:04 PM
|
 |
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,241
|
|
If only we knew when we were younger, it’s a bad idea to sign a contract with someone who is incentivized to break it.
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:20 AM.
|
Linear Mode
