Starting Over

Northern Spirit · #1 03-03-2011, 01:17 AM

I am starting over. My stepson has repeatedly physically assualted my sons and now again today and then assaulted me. ( They are all 16 years of age). I finally laid charges and now my wife ( of 3 years) has stated our relationship is over.

If any members in the Red Deer area have any used household/ bedroom / living room stuff you looking to get rid of / willing to gift it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks and PM me if you are able.

Ron

pickrel pat · #2 03-03-2011, 02:02 AM

you did the right thing. sucks though to have to wait 3 years to see what your wife is really like.

Alberta Bigbore · #3 03-03-2011, 08:21 AM

You did the right thing. Good on you for protecting your boys and laying charges. !!

burblecut · #4 03-03-2011, 08:26 AM

Best of luck starting over. You never know, maybe this fresh start will be the best thing that has ever happened. Life works in strange ways.

Okotokian · #5 03-03-2011, 08:38 AM

You have to do what you have to do. Assault is not acceptable. That said, have you attempted to get help, family counselling, having the boy seen my a mental health expert? I hate to see anyone throw in the towel without exploring every avenue. Also, if this boy doesn't get some help I'm pretty sure where he will end up. Not a nice place.

sureshot · #6 03-03-2011, 08:42 AM

I wish you the best on your new journey. As far as the wife and stepson are concerned it shows the apple doesn't really fall far from the tree. Sounds like you are better of now. Best of luck.

Andy

RedHeadedFisherman · #7 03-03-2011, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Northern Spirit

I am starting over. My stepson has repeatedly physically assualted my sons and now again today and then assaulted me. ( They are all 16 years of age). I finally laid charges and now my wife ( of 3 years) has stated our relationship is over.

If any members in the Red Deer area have any used household/ bedroom / living room stuff you looking to get rid of / willing to gift it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks and PM me if you are able.

Ron

Hi.. have you tryed
The Red Deer Salvation Army
Captains Jason & Tammy Sabourin

Red Deer Corps
4837-54 Street
Phone: 403-346-2251
Fax: 403-342-5892
they have emergency food/clothing/home essentials

Food Bank - Monday-Friday to provide a short-term emergency supply of food to those in need. Emergency clothing and other urgent assistance is also available. Please call 403-346-2251 to make an appointment

Emergency Services - The Salvation Army consults and co-operates with all community agencies to assure that in an identified, confirmed emergency, basic needs such as shelter, food, clothing and basic furniture are quickly provided.
Also Social Services & Welfare" in Red Deer (it’s not a stigma to be in need!)
They can help with emergence lodging setting up a basic house food clothes ect ( been there done that, before I was on AISH)
Some other places to try, if they can not help they are good places to get further info on who can..

Health Families Region Six
102 Morningside Dr (403) 309-8218

Red Deer Food Bank Society
7429 49 Ave #12 (403) 346-1505

Name: Catholic Social Svc
5000 50 Ave #202 (403) 346-7055

City:Red Deer, ab T4N0A1-
Phone: (403) 342-1890

Hope this helps you,
RHF

Jwood 456 · #8 03-03-2011, 10:44 AM

Sorry to hear about the troubles you are having. Wish you the best luck with restarting.

Northern Spirit · #9 03-03-2011, 10:38 PM

The stepson has been in AADAC youths PCHAD ( drug detox program) , recently threatened suicide ( for which we spent a day at the hospital) and the crises team came back with a diagnosis to his mom that he is a master manipulator headed on a fast train to destruction , the wife and I have been in couples counselling for several months ( and each time we come home from a counselling session she lets it be known she thinks it is all alot of hogwash.

I am a youth worker and I know that yesterday when I put her son in an restraint so i could get my son to leave the house, if I had used any force except for the restrint she would have charged me immediately, YET when I charge her son - she states things are over.

Her son has been a messed up kid for many kid and his dad refuses to let him come home.

Every avenue has been tried , and now she declares it final. I have spoken to a couple of counsellors who know the family and they have assured me I did the right thing , they stated the mental health as well as physical health is the most important thing to me and that I should have left long ago.

rugatika · #10 03-04-2011, 12:19 AM

Best wishes, and here's to the start of a great life. Sounds like you went above and beyond in trying to make things work, and good for you for sticking up for and putting your kids first.

HunterDave · #11 03-04-2011, 12:37 AM

Well, not only do you have to protect your boy but you have to look after your own health as well. Definitely not a good situation but you have to do what's best for everyone, including yourself. People only have one life to live and who wants to live it in fear or as a raving lunatic? A man's gotta do what's best. I just hope that you don't end up in a on again off again situation that's going to wear you down and cloud your judgement. Good luck to you.

Redfrog · #12 03-04-2011, 08:05 AM

Lawyer up, or you may get more than a new start from this situation.

Albertadiver · #13 03-04-2011, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redfrog

Lawyer up, or you may get more than a new start from this situation.

Hang in there.

mudbug · #14 03-04-2011, 06:15 PM

Try Kijiji for some of the items your looking for

Best of luck

gutline homestead · #15 03-06-2011, 02:06 PM

you stand tall man.the boy`s need you and the ex needs to see that some stuff is not allowed. STAND TALL.

Ruger1022 · #16 03-06-2011, 02:46 PM

Hey if your ever Calgary way let me know with a PM, I have some stuff...T.V. ect.

Hang in there, do what you think is right!!

If anyone laid a finger on my kids, they would get a little more than a restraint...

fallen1817 · #17 03-06-2011, 02:57 PM

That non-violent crisis intervention course is a wonderful thing to have, especially in situations where you have to restrain minors. You definitely did the right thing, and I know it is not my place to say, but I feel that you are better off without her (I apologize if this is crossing my boundary). You never know if the boy doing the assaulting will go for a weapon, and that could lead to a multitude of very very ugly situations. On the lighter side, think of how much time you will have for the outdoors. I wish the best of luck to you, and commend you for your courage. I wish more people would stand up to these situations and actually REPORT these crimes.

Best wishes,

-Jeff

slipbobber · #18 03-06-2011, 08:21 PM

I will be in Calgary on Saturday or Sunday with a 1/2 ton so if anyone has something Northern Spirit can use I would be willing to deliver it to him.